Love Isn't Perfect....Nor Should it Be

“Try to see it my way,
Only time will tell if I am right or I am wrong.
Why do you see it your way
There's a chance that we may fall apart before too long.”

Ok so this isn’t exactly how the Beatles wrote it, but sadly this is what I thought they wrote, and it sort of makes perfect sense to me. I don’t know about you, but there have been countless times that I’ve been in an argument and I’ve said “Just try to see it from my perspective. Put yourself in my shoes so you can understand why I feel the way I feel.” Of course this sentiment is true, but only as partial truth…which I didn’t realize until this weekend. I didn’t realize that I was saying this statement not because I had taken time to think about how the other person was feeling and what is causing them to act a certain way; I was saying this because I thought I was right and I was trying to make the other person understand that I was right. OOPS!

So…yesterday I had a hormone/exhaustion/spoiled-brat tantrum. I’m talking like a two year old full on meltdown, where you are crying so hard that you can’t breathe and snot is pouring down your face but you don’t really realize it because its mixed with so many tears. Yeah..THAT kind of meltdown. I’m really embarrassed about this and it’s hard for me to admit it openly but, this is a journey here so I’ve got to be open and honest about my experiences and lessons learned from them.

Now what caused this tantrum you might ask? Well…I could say boredom and loneliness had a big factor, but honestly it was mostly because my boyfriend was hanging out with his friends and not me. Now this could be a legitimate reason to be upset…unless you take into consideration that we were all hanging out together and I got tired and left. Plus when I was leaving, I told him to stay and have fun and to take his time…”no need to rush home” were my exact words, I believe. Then, when he wasn’t home two hours later I got upset and screamed at him over the phone saying he OBVIOUSLY didn’t care about our relationship and then started sobbing hysterically because he was “avoiding coming home” because he didn’t like me. Um….ok Laura!…get a flippin grip!!

Yeah I know, embarrassing, and pathetic! The worst part was that I tried to justify why I was mad at him by essentially telling him that he should have been able to predict my thoughts and feelings at the exact moment that they were occurring and react accordingly. AND…because he didn’t posess these super powers…he was a horrible boyfriend.

Seriously…who gave me a first class ticket to crazytown!!! No one would be able to live up to those expectations! Just because I am living in this quest for “perfection” doesn’t mean that I need to drag everyone down with me!

I guess I am learning another lesson about perfection. Love isn’t perfect, nor should it be. Now, the challenge is to remember this before I get upset again. Maybe it would be helpful to write that mantra on my cell phone home screen!